Sunday 27 May 2018

Knowing when to Speak up and when to stay Silent

                      To Speak up or not to Speak Up



 One of the issues psychologists face is that of rationality and irrationality in humans. Have you ever lashed out irrationally, only to realize way out of time that you really shouldn't have said the words blurted out in the heat of the moment? OR Have you ever been faced with a dilemma of whether to boldly speak out your opinion? 
Read on to find out how to know when to speak up and when to keep your cool.

                When NOT to Poke In:


To quote Lincoln: "It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool then to speak up and remove all doubt"

1) When a friend or loved one is venting about their problems, chances are they probably just want a shoulder to cry on, of someone who cares. And in that particular moment of grief, they may not need your advice. Keep it for later.

2) When an elder or senior is trying to convey some golden words, do not way in to show how intellectually superior you yourself are. Even if the advice is plain and your plate is full of them, learn to listen to what they have to say patiently. Your never know what might truly change your life.

3) When you are angry, lashing out at the nearest target might not be a good idea. Remove yourself immediately from the situation, however difficult it may be. Think it over, then speak at a time when you feel calmer.

4) When you don't know about something and unsure of how to put your opinion on a topic, its probably better to stay quiet until you have formed a solid view point. 

5) Last but not the least, stay quiet when you know the other person just wants to put you down and is not necessarily interested in a fair argument. Don't get yourself intertwined in a fool's argument or they will only drag you down to their level.
     
                    When To Speak Up:



1) When staying quiet will come with a high cost.
Only a person themselves can answer this. It is highly subjective. Considering the situation you are faced with, only you can tell whether not speaking up will put a mark on your values and what you stand for. Or will speaking up lead to an unnecessary dispute. Consider what is at stake and decide whether it is important enough to pick up a possible fiery argument.

2) When it will encourage others to speak up. As we have seen with the trending #MeToo movement that telling the truth by even one person can elicit nationwide support, which leads to a large number of people coming out with their own truth. If you speaking up lends a hand to other people to speak up, then you must break the silence.

3) For the greater good. When you are working in a team or on a project that is greater than just you, not speaking up while your team continues to tread on the wrong path can be seen as plain selfish. Speak up when it is important for the good of the team or for other people. Specially when you can see you know something valuable others may not know.

4) When not speaking up can lead to others taking you non-seriously. For example your boss or a supervisor may see you as less talented or not devoted enough because you don't contribute to discussions and meetings etc. Never let anyone put a tag on you. While working, you should be passionate enough to make this bigger than you and speak out your suggestions in team discussions. Never let anyone disrespect you or take you for granted.

Make your worth known.